What if dentists were in charge of Thanksgiving dinner?
FELLOW cooks, it is time to take control of the giant meal you are about to prepare. Instead of shouldering all the work, silently fuming at the relatives and worrying over the menu, you’ll have a saner, more satisfying holiday if you approach Thanksgiving like an effective leader.
Preparing a large meal and running a practice aren’t really all that different. Both endeavors present organizational challenges and require delivery of a superior final product by a specific deadline. And the successful execution of both dinner and dentistry ultimately depends on that most volatile of commodities, the human being. So why not approach Thanksgiving as an effective leader might?
“It starts with asking yourself, as the Thanksgiving chief architect, what is your vision for this day and this meal?”
Great Thanksgiving leadership starts with a vision.
Don’t micromanage every dish and orchestrate every interaction among guests. Think bigger. Do you want to recreate exactly the meals your mother prepared? Or do you want to push through to a new culinary frontier?
The next step would be to determine the leadership style in order to execute this meal – a micromanager would send e-mail messages containing specific recipes for guests who want to bring a dish. The host would also institute quality control checks, tasting all dishes before serving them. This executive would keep a tight hand on the seating chart, too.
This style of management can be exhausting, though, and runs the risk of everyone talking for years to come about what a control freak you are.
The other alternative is a more effective approach – letting go. You still have expectations – the ‘what’ and the ‘why’, but you leave the ‘how’ to your family and friends.
That doesn’t mean Uncle Eddie can bring any dish he wants or your friends from out of town can show up whenever the mood strikes. But instead of imposing a strict timeline for dinner and assigning specific recipes weeks ahead, the effective Thanksgiving leader might ask that people arrive early enough to allow plenty of social time and invite contributions in certain categories, like vegetables or desserts.
Stephen Covey says, ‘delegation is essential’. Effective delegation focuses on results – the ‘what’, not the ‘how’. The idea is to agree on what needs to be done, and then allow the person assigned that job to complete it as he or she sees fit. Who knows? Cousin Betty’s recipe for Sweet Potato casserole might actually be better than yours! Gasp!
Whatever the task, communicate it clearly and give some thought to who might benefit from doing it. Your brother always helped your grandmother make the gravy. Shouldn’t he have the honors this year? A high school student allowed to say the prayer will feel like an adult. Asking your shy neighbor to make sure everyone has a drink gives her a reason to interact.
Delegation is a terrific way to develop people. And no task is too small to delegate, whether napkin folding or candle lighting. By delegating, you are showing those around you that you have confidence in them to accomplish a goal. You help build confidence and self worth when you lead this way. Allow everyone to contribute.
Naturally, even the best plans get derailed. When things take a turn, a good leader will remind the person causing the problem of the original vision. By allowing others to fail, you are giving them the opportunity to own the situation.
By providing the vision and allowing others to shine, a good Thanksgiving leader should be able to sit back and enjoy a blessed day!